On soda and health problems

The study:
There's a correlation between people who drink soda (regular or diet) and people who have heart problems.

The idiotic news media interpretation:
There's a causality between drinking soda and having heart problems.

The restatement of the study conclusions, for the slow people who might otherwise come to (and write about) a totally incorrect interpretation:
Fat, unhealthy people are more likely to drink soda than healthy people.

Now, anyone who wouldn't read my restatement of the study conclusions and say 'duh...'? Funny how couching something that simple in scientific jargon like 'correlation' and rearranging it causes a stirring of the stupids.