Thursday, February 11, 2010

Obama and the Boy Scouts?

This year marks the 100th anniversary of the Boy Scouts. In lieu of this, and being a boy scout once upon a time, I thought it might be fun to evaluate our comrade Obama against the traits which define a boy scout, per the scout oath. We'll keep score, and see how Obama stacks up to other American boys whom he would nominally be setting an example for.

So, if I remember correctly, a scout is:

  • Trustworthy

  • People with this quality are honest, can be trusted to do the right thing even if it difficult, and are not corrupt. Any of this sound like any politician, much less Obama? Leading of with a solid zero points for this one.

  • Loyal

  • This one is more mixed, since it really depends on who you're considering. Obama has been very loyal to his liberal base and campaign doners, pilfering billions in taxpayer money for special interests while continuing to relentlessly advocate a socialist agenda. On the other hand, he has cheerfully ignored his duty to uphold the Constitution, his responsibility to protect the country from enemies, and his promises to change corrupt politics in Washington. We'll give him 1/2 a point.

  • Helpful

  • Well, I guess if you're a campaign doner or a banking executive you might disagree, but I think most of the rest of the country would give him a zero here. It might be hard to say what another person might have done in his place, but it's hard to believe anyone could have been less hopeful to America's long-term interests than Obama so far. No points here.

  • Friendly

  • Hm, gonna have to say mixed. Obama puts on a good face publicly, and is fairly proficient and reciting his prepared speeches, but behind closed doors (and increasingly publicly) he's revealing more of his contempt for anyone who refuses to bow to him and fall in line. Still, 1/2 point for this.

  • Courteous

  • It's hard to be a seasoned politician without mastering this quality, and Obama succeeds here. Some might argue that bowing to foreign dictators and giving Iran the green light to develop nuclear weapons is a bit too generous for the American President, but it's hard to argue that Obama is not accommodating and cordial. A full point for this one.

  • Kind

  • This one is not really applicable to the presidency, so I'm gonna discount it. I have no idea if Obama exhibits this quality or not.

  • Obedient

  • Another pass on this one; you could argue he earns the point for sticking to the party line, but it's not really a desirable quality in his professional capacity, so I'll ignore it for scoring purposes.

  • Cheerful

  • Obama gets a 1/2 point for this one, as he's typically stoic.

  • Thrifty

  • If you could get negative points, it would be hard to capture the magnitude of failure on this point; I guess it will suffice to say a solid, unequivocal zero here.

  • Brave

  • Well, it would have been brave to let the big banks fail, instead of giving in to their blackmail. Also brave would have been standing up to your own party when they advanced bad and/or corrupt ideology. Working with the Republicans to fix the underlying actual problems with the banking system, instead of exploiting the crisis, that would have been brave. Obama is not that kind of person, no points here.

  • Clean

  • I'm gonna expand this from the colloquial physically clean to include corruption and dirty politics, since it seems more applicable to the position. Obama gets high marks for physical cleanliness, and low marks for political dirt. So, 1/2 a point here.

  • Reverent

  • In a surprise, I'm gonna have to give him reasonable credit here. After all, this typically denotes religious subservience, and Obama is a steadfast believer in the Church of Global Warming. He also might be Christian or Muslim depending on the occasion, is a strong believer in the socialist doctrine, and follows his party doctrine well. If only he believed in the Constitution and the separation of powers in the US government, he's get a whole point; only 1/2 point then.

    So, as a final tally, we have 10 applicable categories, and Obama scores a 3.5/10. Hm, I guess Obama would not have made a good boy scout. Oh well, happy anniversary to the Boy Scouts anyway, just don't look to Obama as a role model. :)

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